The Calling

Posted on 8th November 2009

My lover used to say many years ago, "I want to go to hajj before I am 40". And I used to answer, "Err before you 40 that would make me go before 37 years old. I am too young lah."

But time passed. Things change. Something happen. Skin sagged. Hips widened.

So, it was last year I decided to go to this hajj talk. The talk was meant for the last years' bakal hajj. At that time I have already felt the need to fulfill the fifth pillar.

So the speaker started off by asking the participant the meaning of talbiyah. I didn't know what the talbiyah means actually. I can recite them because it is always repeated on TV. I can recall it from my childhood memories. Anyway I think in the end someone read from the book, but the speaker reiterated it.

Aku menyahut panggilan-Mu ya Allah. Aku menyahut panggilan-Mu ya Allah dan tiada sekutu apapun bagi-Mu. Sesungguhnya puji, nikmat dan kekuasaan hanya bagi-Mu tanpa sekutu apapun bagi-Mu dan juga segala kekuasaan adalah milik Mu. Ya Allah aku menyahut panggilan-Mu. Tiada sekutu bagi Mu.

Here I am responding to You, O Allah, Here I am responding to You. Here I am, You have no partner, here I am responding to you. Verily all praise and blessings are Yours, and all sovereignty, You have no partner.

He got me at "menyahut panggilan Mu." I don't know how to tell you how I felt, but when I heard what it meant, I felt ashamed of my ignorance. I am ashamed that I have ignored God for the most part of my life. I felt small. But on the other hand I felt hope because I know that I can still respond to Him. I cried passionately that day, until someone passed me a tissue. :P. But because of that, I made a resolution that I want to go as soon as I can. Alhamdulillah. All praises goes to Allah for all the bounties that He has bestowed.

I wonder if lover remembers what he said about making hajj by 40. He is after all born in the year 69. Pray for us.